There is a saying that to be successful and protect your valuable time, you need to learn to say “No.”
I couldn’t agree more.
There is so much demand on our time these days that we could allow Twitter, Facebook, Zoom and lunch meetings to easily dominate our lives without thinking about it. The time spent on these activities is often lost and not productive.
It pays to say “No” to the things that don’t move you forward and “Yes” to those that do.
I said “Yes” a few weeks ago and didn’t realize what an impactful day it would be.
I was in my room in Lake Tahoe when my phone rang. A friend was on the other end inviting me to take a walk by the lake. I had no plans; he’s a good friend, and I was bored.
I ran down to the lobby. Six of us jumped in the car to find a place for a short hike. I only knew two of the six, but we quickly got to know each other.
Within minutes of reaching the trail, we organically broke up into three sets of two. The conversation I had was deep, enlightening, and will likely have a positive effect on my future. In fact, at one point, my partner and I joked that we should have had drones following us to record the conversations!
Apparently the other two groups had the same experience. When we got in the car, we debriefed each conversation. Everybody learned something. Everybody moved forward a little bit.
The interesting part is that all six people were already considered “wealthy and successful,” yet few of the conversations mentioned money, and the conversations in the car never touched on it.
Wealth has many components and only one is money. This group was not focused on survival or acquisition. It was seeking contribution and growth.
Part of your success in life revolves around the people you spend the most time with. Associations matter.
If you spend time with people who are negative, complaining, and not improving every day, they will pull you down with them. If you associate with people who build you up and are always trying to grow themselves, you will eventually rise to their level.
I implore you to curate your associations and say “No” to the ones that sap your energy, slow your progress, and deepen self-limiting beliefs. Say “Yes” to the ones that stretch your mind, encourage you to grow and sometimes make you uncomfortable.
That discomfort will expand your mindset and reveal possibilities that you previously didn’t think you were talented enough or “worthy” enough to achieve.
I am grateful to the people and situations to which I have said “Yes”, and I continue to be diligent about saying “No” when it doesn’t move me toward my goals.
I encourage you to find associations that enhance your life and give you the opportunity to provide value to others. Look for groups or people that are already where you want to be, or are striving toward the same goals.
Within those relationships you will find new ideas, motivation, business opportunities and potentially lifelong friends. Most are free, but pay for it if you must. That’s an investment that will pay outsized, lifetime dividends.
So, it’s okay to say “Yes” once in a while. What have you got to lose!
